limitations

on most days i feel like i'm pretty good at my job
but there are exceptions
like today

every day has a long list of things to be done
a litany of big problems
and minor details

but my dirty little secret is
i have to work at it
especially the little things

go figure
you say

no really

thing is i'm just not detail oriented
i'm scatterbrained
with a short attention span
disorganized
and
messy as fuck

while writing comes naturally
[can't you tell]
believe it or not
math and engineering are hard for me
and i am constantly
cleaning up after my own stupidity
success comes only through careful scouring for mistakes
and iterative improvements on stuff that starts off
crappy

[my awesome grades in college
weren't a coincidence
you know]

so when it's brought to my attention
that i missed something
[usually by someone who is a little more persnickety]

it's a nice reminder that
deep down
i'm a fuckup

and i'm fine with that really
maybe if i was actually good at it
i wouldn't bust my ass so hard

and maybe you don't get one without the other