regret, number 3200

recently a friend commented on
being annoyed with a charity

it's such an awkward position to be in
here they are busting their asses to do good in the world
and who are we
lucky rich yuppies
to criticize them for inconveniencing us
they've got bigger problems
than little old me

over the past five years
i have loved every moment of the pan-mass challenge
even if sometimes only in retrospect
part of it is the camaraderie with other riders that you see
all over the roads of eastern massachusetts
waving
honking
wearing a nasty pink jersey
knowing that you're all training for the same goal

in the past couple years though
i sometimes meet another kind of rider
at a traffic light or
whatever
not tons but a handful for sure
people who just can't afford to do the pmc anymore

the fundraising minimum has nearly doubled since my first year
and the admirable goal of increasing the staggering overall total
every year
combined with the fact that the ride has totally overwhelmed
back roads across the state
means that it has to go up

but i'm priced out
for me the fundraising for the trip to p-town
is like a hors-categorie climb for me
and three months after the lump sum i don't raise
hits my credit card
i've got to find a way to stop myself from doing it again
now don't get me wrong
i like love helping out
i always plan to be the majority donor
it's my own responsibility
and my own
damn fault
i am not better at it
but the sad fact of the matter is
even though it'll kill me to watch the registration day pass right by
i just can't do it anymore

and amazing as they are
surely a charitable organization is doing something a little wrong
when people who want to help are discouraged from doing so

so dear reader
if you'd like to donate
now's the time
and if you have already
thank you so much again
and please find someone to support next year